Asked Out a Girl I Never Talked to Got Rejected and Trying to Ask Her Out Again
I know you're scared of being rejected by girls (or guys). It'southward intimidating. And what happens if she says no? What are y'all going to exercise in that extremely awkward five 2nd walk away from her? You will most likely trip and fall into a behemothic water puddle nearby and all of her friends will laugh and throw their pilus dorsum like a scene out of Hateful Girls. As this plays out in your mind, you slowly convince yourself of all of the reasons why you should play it safe and not talk to her.
I'm going to give yous three solid reasons why you lot should get upward, be a human (or a adult female), become say the words that need to be said, and be a hero by winning her eye.
Reason One: A simple rejection isn't a well informed determination about your character.
You're scared of her maxim no to you lot, or how hard the rejection will be on your self-esteem. If you're a normal human beingness, yous might even experience a tinge of self doubt. Am I even an bonny person? These are all normal thoughts, but they aren't rational.
Here'southward why: She doesn't know who you are. She doesn't know that you lot volunteer on weekends at the humane society. She doesn't know that you're a admirer and a scholar. She doesn't know that yous were really nervous when you lot introduced yourself and that commonly your palms don't sweat like yous but finished running a marathon in the Sahara Desert.
She is giving yous an respond based on an infinitely small judgment of who you are as a person. A big majority of her stance on how bonny she thinks you are depends on your charisma when you present yourself.
Fundamental: Untie rejection and your self worth.
Reason Two: Her stance doesn't define your worth.
I had a wise friend one time tell me that fifty-fifty if you're the all-time looking guy in the world, there are going to be girls who remember you're ugly. Information technology's a fact of life. I've even met women who think Brad Pitt is ugly. I mean, c'mon.
The betoken is, one person's opinion is just that- an opinion. I've found through my own rejection journeying that opinions are the most arable item on the entire Earth.
Key: Acknowledge that the stance of i person, cannot and shouldn't dictate the way you see yourself. For every person who thinks y'all're ugly, there will be i who thinks you're beautiful, smart, and extremely hilarious. Don't quit looking.
Reason Iii: The only fashion to develop confidence is through all-encompassing practice.
And so maybe she really is way out of your league and you're going to endeavor and pull off a homerun. In this kind of situation, don't worry about the outcome of the answer. Simply tell yourself this, "In that location is a very probable take a chance this girl will say no to me." Then have that answer, and go for information technology anyway, embracing the craziness.
"Hullo, I know you're way too cute for me. But I knew I couldn't exit here without proverb hello. Then hello, and if yous don't recollect I'm the worst looking guy in the world would it be okay if I bought you lot dinner sometime?"
(Heyo! You killed it, prissy task.)
"No cheers."
Well, you tried. The best part most this experience was now yous are one pace closer to developing the confidence you demand to calmly talk to women and ask them out on dates. Recall of it like constantly going to the gym. If you lot don't work out for half dozen months and and so endeavour to bosom out an hour on the cardio machines, you're likely going to throw up or fall over from exhaustion.
It'south the same for talking to women, if you never practice talking to them, introducing yourself, and figuring out which talking points work or don't piece of work, and so yous'll never quite build that mental dating muscle.
Central: The more you lot inquire women out, the ameliorate you'll be.
If you lot're trying to figure out a applied style to get over your fearfulness of request someone out, I take a challenge to nudge you in the correct management. Leave and get five women to reject you in a public place. Don't be a creepy weirdo, merely inquire them if they would like to have dinner with you. The rules for this challenge are you lot tin can't prevarication nor break the constabulary. Exterior of that, be creative and savor learning how to get over your fear. While you're warming upwardly for your challenge, watch this video of me getting rejected past five women in the Whole Foods parking lot.
Video of Me Getting Rejected By 5 Women
This is office 3 of a series I'm doing called Rejection Remedy-- the idea that nosotros can conquer all the fears in our life by using rejection every bit the remedy.
Source: https://www.rejectiontherapy.com/blog/2014/10/10/how-to-get-over-the-fear-of-asking-someone-out
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